December 10, 2009

My Way of Life

I was wondering, how come I had never taken a flight from Hyderabad-New York via Frankfurt, never found smelling currency in my bank account or never drove an Audi. But still, I strongly believe I’m the happiest person living!! Putting before you a few sessions of my confidence which led to happiness!!

Since my final year of Engineering I was very much fascinated about cinema. At a very young age ManiRatnam made me inclined towards filmmaking, RGV during my adolescence and Sekhar Kammula influenced me with Anand. Though I was not into any craft of film making directly, I rendered how a scene can be gripped on my own way in writing. Writing gradually came out of my interest. I did not create any miracle but, scripting made me strong and happy, as I am never before. How writing made me happy… my words….

Initially I was a bit sceptical blogging some stories that were little close to reality. This time I wanted to make much closer to the human truth. This happened when my friend Raghu was discussing with me about blogging and happy living. I started blogging immediately I read “Five point Someone”. Of course, I read and inspired. With the recent “2 States”, I felt I can perform better than Chetan Bhagat, who frequently uses sex as a seduction in all his. Hey, my confidence levels aren’t high; it’s an approach to which my views were given a silhouette. I found immense satisfaction in writing. So I made it….

At my early stage of writing I was little timid exposing my feelings in public. But, some external power made me open-up my views (may be the girl in the train!!). So happened, “Signs of Love” which was true….by nature!! It gave me an enormous confidence and happiness that I never attained. Though people did not enjoy my other writings to that extent, I did not stop. Coz, I felt, my pleasure feels bad….just like

"సరదాకి సిగ్గేస్తే.....మంచికి మొహమాటం అడోచ్చినట్టు!!"

Saradaki Siggesthe.…..Manchiki Mohamatam Adochchinattu”.

I was happy blogging!! But, due to little down in my career…..i stopped blogging in the name of “Career Concentration”. IT’S A LIE.

“Siggu” and “Mohamatam” overlapped at one stage……So, I stopped blogging for quiet a while.

Recently, I attended an interview with an MNC in Bangalore. I landed there with hope weighing a tonne, I cleared the final technical & HR. But, hope didn’t remain for long….pchchch…I lost the interview. Immediately, I sold my “lost hope” to “heartfull of disappointment”. The same evening when I was in search to gain little confidence, I found my seat in S5 with baggage on my back and India Today weekly with a cover page “Sex Survey 2009- The Fantasy Report” in my right hand. I killed some time reading the Fantasy report. The whole night I was in hunt of little pleasure that will stuff-in some confidence. Amma, Daddy, Reddygadu, and Anushka arrived in sleep but, they did not really get into. Amma for Love ,Daddy for Confidence, Reddygadu for giggling and Anushka here for Romance and Pleasure. But none of them won. Yet, I need to build confidence for further Interviews and future living. “Aathmavisvasam, anedhi……Aathmasthairyanni nimpe aayudham…..manishi payanam lo baga panikostundhi”. So I started writing….here’s the reality!!

The Reality

The truth is that, all these days I masked myself in the name of refurbishing my career. To be honest, it was false! “My real contentment lies in blogging. Coz, I gain a lot of confidence in writing….so in a way I’m boosting myself to perform more in doing other activities. I do get lot more satisfaction and this fulfilment doesn’t let me feel lonely or feel dejected….” i have these words in heart, but shared by raghu during our recent conversation. So, these words hammered me and awaken the Self-Actualization!!

The Self-Actualization

Very few people go with their interests…..some times people hesitate doing anything of their wish. It was because of hundreds of eyes watching them. Even I made the same mistake. During my study, I found few eyes watching and very few hearts caring, when it comes to reality. my roomies & close buddies were among them.

పని ఉన్న వాడికి పక్కవాడి ప్రయత్నాలు పట్టించుకునే ప్రాధాన్యం తక్కువ కదా!

Pani unna vadiki pakkodi prayatnalanu pattinchukune pradhanyam thakkuva kada”

“I made a habit of complimenting a person who has done good or favour in any form. Say, it can be……..not using mobile while driving (or) a person with good traffic sense etc. They feel happy!! I attended my close friends wedding in Vijayawada in November. There, the food was too delicious and yummy; I never tasted such a menu in the past 10 years. Soon, I complimented the caterer, which made him turn over joyous and feel proud about the tasty menu he served. Due to the interview schedules, I really missed attending few other weddings of my friend in vizag. Weddings are once in a life time affair for everyone. I, as a person seek to make my presence the most possible…It’s just not they invited, they definitely expect us at the time of invite and I land up there with world’s best wishes for their relationship.”…, these injected happiness in me!!

The Happiness

I do not do all these for any credibility…….I do for my happiness, my world, my life.

Just try to reach out to your happiness…..Congratulate, Wish a good luck, Inspire and Encourage the people before you. You would be amazed how everyone around you will respond--and how much better you will feel.

Anyway the point of this whole article is that I am just so fascinated and intended to see people happy, be optimistic, be funny…..I just live in the moment of real self-actualization and love every person deeply. All these make me stand confident with happiness. Finally, my close buddies are also a reason for my rear, pure and eternal nature!

PS: I requested a 40 yr old, not to use his mobile while driving……in return, I was bashed with the world’s worst language.





Jaszalcatraz said...

Keep writing. You still need to go a loong way before you can consider taking up blogging as a career.

Srujan said...

Ya i do....n Thnx preetam

raja said...

nice post srujan..keep going and all the best.

Uday Cheruku said...

Nice blog ra... i ve been an avid reader of ur blogs and felt close to heart reading them. And hey we both share quite a few common things, notable of which raghu was source of inspiration in some way or the other to both of us...